Perth was pretty high on my list of cities to see but not because it’s known for anything in particular. Ok it is known for a cute marsupial called a quokka that only lives on an island off the coast, but I didn’t know that until I mentioned wanting to go to Perth to Bren. The initial reason I wanted to come here is because it is the often forgotten city in Australia. So far from the rest of civilization it has little going for it as a tourist destination except to say that you’re one of the few willing to make the journey to nothing (and quokkas).
I had a bit of a false start on my way here. I had booked a flight for 11pm, the last flight of the day and the cheapest, but even when I booked there was a small voice in my head that said “you will procrastinate so much that you will probably miss this flight,” and that’s pretty much what happened. After spending some time with Bren at the kitchen table in the morning sharing his smoothie concoction that he’s been making (with fish oil, berries, flax, chia, almond milk, and who knows what else) I took a nice long nap after which I felt compelled to make my favorite Argentinian empanadas for dinner. Then Bren was home for work and we ate together and then I was having such a good time that I just wasn’t in a rush to leave. That plus an uber that took a longer route then necessary left me half way to the gate watching my flight go off to Perth without me. I went back to the apartment and was pretty upset. I knew I could always go to Perth in a week or so when I had free time again but having already spent $400AUD and then spending another $400AUD just tasted sour in my mouth. Bren was drunk in the living room with Alana and Jobin when I got back. He kept telling me that I had to go because I had been looking forward to it for so long. Jobin said I had to go because he was living vicariously through me and wanted me to catch a quokka selfie to bring home to them. After another false start while nursing a warm cocktail, Jobin offered his personal assistant services and proceeded to sit there and book me a new flight on the correct date. He also started to book me a hotel but I told him it was fine I would just go to the hostel I had planned on staying at. Bren in his half conscious state celebrated the renewal of my trip and Jobin did his little happy karate kick to celebrate our victory.
Having successfully made it to my flight (after nearly scaring half to death at Bren strolling into the house in the wee hours of the morning since he decided to continue the party at one of his favorite drunken cocktail bars) I then made it to Perth to be greeted by the blisteringly strong sun. An uber ride and unpacking my things at my hostel I was off to see what the city of Perth was all about.
I decided to walk into the city center, after all this remote work has been kind to my waistline thanks to lots of very long walks, and quickly realized that I should’ve let Personal Assistant Jobin complete the task of booking me a hotel. My hostel is probably a 40min walk from the center of the city center which is annoying. Still it was a good way to see what the city of Perth was all about by traversing the entire length of it. I got to the docks to check out where the ferry to Rottnest Island aka quokkaville was and stumbled upon one of my favorite tourist activities - a hop on, hop off bus tour. It was expensive ($40AUD) but I thought what the heck else am I going to do today? The weather here is hot just like on the east coast of Australia but where the east coast is humid, Perth is arid. I could feel the water being sucked out of my body from the sun just from walking to the docks, I couldn’t imagine how much of a husk I would become if I kept walking around as a means of seeing the city. So without another thought I paid and got on the upper deck of the bus where I promptly scorched my butt checks on the amazingly hot plastic chair. The chair cooled enough to stop cooking my butt and the breeze when we were moving was nice.
Suddenly the bus comes to a complete halt on the freeway. The pre-recorded audio said, “hold on to your hats as we cruise down the freeway,” but all we did was sit there. The sun was so brutal I felt like I had been placed on a human sized grill and was slowly cooking like a pig on a spit so I moved downstairs to the air conditioning and took the last available seat. I sat there resting like a grilled steak, slowly stopping the cooking process, as we didn’t move for nearly 15 minutes. The exhaustion of not sleeping the night before was setting in, helped along by the sun coming in through the windows. Another 20 or so minutes later we were back on course and stopping at the botanical gardens. I thought it was as good a place as any to get off and try to find some water. The dehydration felt debilitating and it had set in so quickly. I slowly walked my way in the shade towards the visitor’s center and spotted a water fountain. I drank as much of the water as I could and started to feel better. A Powerade and two more waters and I was finally motivated to take a look around. The botanical garden had a gorgeous view of the whole city and so many wonderful exhibits about the history of Perth and it’s flora and fauna.
The downside to my hop on hop off bus was that it looked like the last bus was around 4pm and it was already 3pm. So I didn’t spend too much time exploring the long winding trail through the garden and I was glad I didn’t because when I got back on the bus, which was now a relic from 1960 with no aircon, I learned that the next stop on the bus was a driving tour through the botanical gardens. As I tried to catch whatever breeze came my way through the archaic windows I learned a lot more and got to see the whole garden without doing any of the walking normally required - quite a steal of a deal!
The unfortunate part was that now I was stuck on the old bus for the rest of my tour. You get used to it but I was still really annoyed that I spent so much money for it. Back through the city, learning about the convict built buildings and the different shopping areas, I felt like I had enough. Just as that thought entered my head we hit what I assumed was the last stop before the ride started over again because the entire bus emptied. I joined the crowd because I didn’t want to be the only one left on this retro vehicle. I thought that I would just make an early evening of it and start the long walk back to my hostel and stop to get some groceries on the way for dinner.
So I started my walk back north and was just admiring the stores and buildings. I saw the visitors center and thought maybe I should go in and find out more about the Rottnest ferries when I looked up and in front of me was an icon that just screamed Bren to me. It said “I heart coffee” but the heart was designed to look like a retro Nintendo controller. I took a photo of it and made a note to find a way to put it on a mug for him when I realized that it must be a coffee shop nearby. Sure enough the next store over was it and I peered in the window to discover only what I could call a gamer nerds nirvana. The menu actually caught my eye first and I thought a bubble tea would be a good way to give me the boost I needed to make it back to the hostel. It was when I walked in that I discovered how amazing the space was. I ordered a bubble tea and the owner was so warm and inviting. I sat down next to a boy who was playing Smash Bros on his Switch and across from a woman and young boy who were playing snes and next to a stack of board games, manga, and comics. It was overwhelmingly perfect and the drink was amazing as well. I sat there for a while enjoying my drink and just soaking in all the nerdiness. When I left I made a note to remember the name Gamecity Espresso Bar and do my best to make a return everyday while I’m here.
Geeked out I wandered my way to the best Coles yet and picked up some food for dinner and something for breakfast tomorrow. Then it was a slow grinding walk back through the whole city. I picked a different street this time and walked through the most spread out Chinatown I’ve ever seen. It basically started and never ended. I decided though on my long walk that Perth so far is a top city and anyone who spends their entire holiday on the east coast is really missing out on something great.
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